Being a woman can be beautiful, but it comes with lots of extra “stuff”. For example, bras and fancy underwear or lingerie can be an excellent wardrobe addition, but how do you know what to buy, where to start, or how to measure?

These are questions many women ask themselves, but I imagine as some trans women do, how do you do that? If you are wanting to wear lingerie for the first time but are worried, embarrassed, or just straight-up unsure. Where can you go for advice to find the perfect fit?

As a woman myself who just learned how to identify my correct bra size and type, I am happy to share suggestions that I wish I had had years ago. Believe me, even cisgender women get bra sizes wrong. 😖

Advice #1: Find or buy a good tape measure for sewing.

I realize you will not be sewing yourself a bra (or maybe you will?), but this is the best way to start tracking your body shape and size. We are all different and it is essential to know your measurements (even if you are not buying online). I found this helpful site that talks about how to choose a good tape measure and how to use it.

Once you have the tape measure, it’s time to get started, but there are a few things to recognize before you do. Trans women have wider ribcages and less softness in the chest area so measuring correctly is imperative. That said, I did find a UK company Bluebella, that offers bra size guides as well as an excellent blog on how to shop for lingerie as a trans woman. Once you have your measurements you can start shopping.

Remember that if you are in North America, and are using a European, Asian, or Australian site, know that you may have to check if they ship to where you are first. Some companies have US or Canadian sites that they require you to order from for logistics purposes. There is nothing more frustrating than finding all the best clothes and filling your cart, only to find out they don’t ship internationally. 😔

Another thought is going into a local shop to have a fitting done. This can be a daunting task however as not all stores are trans-friendly and it is best to do a bit of online investigation first to see what others have done in your area (if possible).

Advice #2: Shop at a specialty lingerie store.

They are usually more expensive, however, they know the various brands and sizing far better than just a mall chain store. Also, they know how to take proper measurements to ensure you get the right fit. There is nothing worse than an ill-fitting undergarment that pinches or chaifs your body in a way that is uncomfortable while sometimes damaging your skin.

Also, remember quality not quantity. You do not need that many good bras. Having one skin-tone, one black, and one fun color is all you really ever need.

Advice #3: Take care of your lingerie.

There is nothing worse than extremely worn out, ripped or God forbid, stinky lingerie. 🦨

Hand wash or wash on a gentle cycle and hang to dry any bras (this way they do not shrink or lose their shape). Bras don’t need to be washed every single time after wear, but if you are hot and sweaty or spill something on them then definitely get them clean.

With panties or underwear, the fancier the fabric, the more care needs to be taken not to damage them. Machine washing is usually ok (in a delicates bag), but definitely spray crotch areas with stain remover for tougher stains.

Some lingerie stores sell gentle, soaps or detergent that is specific to lingerie care. I do personally like them as most smell great, make my delicates last so much longer, and also help retain their colors! A win-win in my books.

All in all, the whole process of dressing for your preferred gender starts with a solid foundation of comfortable and pretty garmets. Do not skrimp on buying beautiful items just because you think you may be the only one seeing them for the foreseeable future (or maybe not?).

Don’t underestimate the confidence you get from knowing you are adorning your body with beautiful, supportive fabrics. This is just one of the ways you can start to admire the body you are creating while feeling feminine and beautiful. 💕